I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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