so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
