I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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