white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize