im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
no you cant smoke seaweed
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
