That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
