She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
We have so much sex to catch up on
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
