hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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