hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
