just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Randomize
