in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Im part way to drunk.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
