I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
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