Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
