Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
