I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
