one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
