C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
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