im drinking this country out of the recession.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
