Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
