If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I would fuck him just for his dog
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
