med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Randomize
