It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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