so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
