I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
