moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
