i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
