I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Randomize
