How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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