When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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