You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
