he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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