this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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