pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
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