Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
