The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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