and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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