All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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