i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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