You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Randomize
