Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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