This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
