I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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