She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
