these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
