Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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