i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
