remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
