just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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