this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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