Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
